Last night I still had a coupon to use for a dinner with a purchase of a drink at Moe's ... one simply does not pass up this deal. So to Moe's after work I went. Determined to make this work. I asked for a burrito bowl with half the rice and added in chicken, lettuce, tomato, cheese, sour cream and Guac ... I skipped the chips (YES ... I SKIPPED THE DELICIOUS CHIPS) and got a "northern tea" as they call it which is in fact ... unsweetened. I was able to avoid the fun game of pick your favorite of the 50 types of soda machine ... I felt good. Till I sat down. How BORING --- a bowl, no chips and unsweetened tea. But I ate it and ate it all I did.
Walking through my apartment door I realized that in the whirlwind that had been the last month of constant travel, long days and exhaustion-- my place was A MESS. I had walked in and dropped whatever I needed to drop. So I got to work. I surprisingly had a lot of energy. Cleaned my living room and kitchen from top to bottom and made a box of all the stuff in my kitchen I didn't need for the next 20 days. Some I will donate to those that want it and others I will just box up and put in the pantry for later if I decide I would like to have it.
Then ... I got hungry! Or I think anyways. I took pictures of myself (I'm not going to post them right now -- I need to have something to post with it to make myself feel better I think) took measurements and got into my comfy clothes.
Here is the challenge.
Here is where I would mindlessly eat while working at the computer or watching tv -- another challenge for the day. DO NOT DO IT.
My friend I mentioned in my original post had told me about a documentary of sorts called FED UP! and that I needed to watch it. So I sat down with my lemon water and fired up the 'ol netflix and started watching it. It was about an hour and a half and as I watched it I forgot about my hunger and just felt sick. Sick that this is what is happening to us as a society and at one point I had tears in my eyes from what I was watching ... and how much I had suppressed as a child. It's something I will be watching again -- probably several times at that...
Then I went to bed.
Throughout the night I had to go to the bathroom A LOT -- as in I don't feel like I slept at all ... but I guess my body was finally getting rid of some of the water weight I've been carrying for weeks ... yeah for swelling to hopefully go down.
I was heartbroken when I woke up and went into the kitchen to see that at some point in the night I had eaten the only two things left in my fridge that I was bringing to work to give to a coworker. Two Chocolate pudding cups. Empty. Sitting on the counter. I live alone so unless someone came in and didn't take anything and just ate the pudding cups I must have eaten them ... somehow ... sometime during the night.
I NEVER SLEEP EAT!! Or do I? Is this something that's been happening and I just never realized it? Or was sugar such an addiction that it was able to play my mind in the middle of the night in a semi conscious state and how on earth do I NOT REMEMBER? SCARY!
I made my coffee got ready for work and left early stopping at the grocery store on the way -- by passing all my usual morning stops -- DD, Starbucks, McDonald's, QuikTrip, Sonic, .... Sorry friends we must breakup.
I'm lucky enough that my work has a complete kitchen so I loaded up with bacon, avocado, eggs, cheese, almond butter, my apple and a few other things and went to work to cook my breakfast -- my co-workers were jealous because I made the office smell good -- I told them if they all do it with me I'll cook every morning :)
I choose health it doesn't choose me.